Victorian Jewelry

Dear Sir, I am seeking to purchase some Victorian Era jewelry for my Second Life wife..what sort of gemstones were popular during the era ..should I be looking for a particular design in a ring? Thank ye kindly.

Sir, you are a gentleman and I commend you on being so thoughtful of your beloved spouse. In order to properly answer your question I had to do a little resarch of my own. I shall summarize some of that information here and will provide links to the articles themselves should you or my other dear readers wish to peruse them. <adjusts his professorial mortar board>

The Victorian era spanned 64 years and is divided into 3 major periods, The Early Victorian Period, or Romantic Period, spanning 1837-1860; the Mid or High Victorian Period, also known as the Grand Period spanning 1860-1885; and the Late Victorian Period, or Aesthetic Period spanning 1885-1901. The world of nature, inspired from styles of the Renaissance and Middle Ages, were very popular motifs in Victorian Jewelry. Bouquets of flowers, branches, leaves, grapes and berries remained fashionable. There was a symbolism associated with flowers that carried through the first half of the century. Snake and serpent motifs, as symbols of wisdom, reached their peak in the 1840's. The most popular metals incorporated into the jewels of the era were 18k to 22k gold, tri-color gold, silver, rolled gold and electroplate.

In the late 1830's to early 40's, lady's clothing fashionably covered all of the body. High necklines and bonnets covered the ears, therefore, necklaces and earrings were not often worn. Extremely large brooches were in vogue, and worn at the neck during the day, or at the low décolletage, often combined with fresh flowers, for evening wear. Adornment of the hands and wrists became increasingly important, with Victorian rings and large bracelets designed to make the hand look dainty and feminine. The most widespread gemstones used in jewelry during the Early Victorian Period were diamonds (rose-cuts and brilliants), amethyst, pink and golden topaz, turquoise, chalcedony, coral, garnet, ruby, seed pearls and cameos. Cameos were fashioned out of many elements, including shell, lava, coral and micro-crystalline, layered quartz varieties.

The latter half of the century saw a revival of Egyptian, Etruscan and Phoenician style jewelry. The passing of the Duchess of Kent, and later Prince Albert, the American Civil War and the assassination of President Lincoln brought death and mourningto the forefront of peoples minds and influenced fashions as well. Lockets became an important fashion accessory. They were often suspended on "book chains" that could double as bookmarks at night.

Although originally considered bad luck, opals became very popular, reaching a peak in 1886. Other popular gemstones in the mid-Victorian period were amethysts, cabochon garnets, crystal, emeralds, diamonds, onyx, pearl, ruby, black glass, bog oak, jet ivory and tortoise shell. Also popular was so-called "Cock Cover Jewelry" fashioned from the ornately hand pierced cock covers from watches made in the previous century. The earliest examples of Victorian solitaire diamond rings, set in both gold and silver were seen in 1895. The most popular gemstones in the late Victorian period were amethyst, aquamarine, chrysoprase, chrysoberyl, opals, moonstones, sapphires, turquoise, peridot and rubies.

For your additional reading:
http://www.langantiques.com/university/index.php/Victorian
http://www.jewelryexpert.com/articles/antique3.htm

And a gallery of Victorian era pieces.
http://www.joden.com/cat/victoria/index.htm

Ask a tiger.

Formality and Friendliness

Why do so many people insist that formality means one is being cold? Or that one cannot be both friendly and formal at the same time?

To my great and good friend I, your humble servant, send this my most heartfelt appreciation for your insightful and poignant query. Pray, allow me now to tender this response. In this present day and age, when the norm of social discourse has become somewhat less genteel than was the case in previous eras, formality has become associated with either pretentiousness or aloofness rather than polite respect. This is aided by conventions of the English language. English has no equivalent to the honorifics of Japanese, for instance. Not so long ago young ladies and gentlemen were instructed in proper deportment and ettiquete. Ones education was not considered "finished" without these important lessons in smoothing the rough edges that so often lead to social frictions.

I am of the firm opinon that it is indeed still possible to conduct oneself properly, with respect and gracious good will toward others. In short that, yes, one can be both formal and friendly. Unfortunately, some with which one interracts will not appreciate this as a show of respect but will revile it as a pretentious affectation.

Once again, I extend my most heartfelt gratitude for thinking of presenting this quandry fo my elicudation. I pray you recieve it in good health and that it will ease your mind.

Formally and unpretentionsly yours,

Onyx Plutonian

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Friends no more?

I have been friends with someone for several months recently I get the feeling he is not interested or cares about our relationship anymore should I just move on? I have talked to him in the past but thinks he just pacifies me and doesn't know how to end.

OK, I got real busy after soliciting these questions two weeks ago and just now have time and energy to answer them. I apologize to the questioners and pray your forgiveness for this delayed response.

Dear friend, thank you for this question. It is a normal progression in any relationship for the initial excietement of discovering one another to wane after a time. This does not neccessarily mean that either party has grown tired of the other. It may simply mean that a comfortable equilibrium has been reached. They may still enjoy one another's company, but not with the same intensity or immediacy as there once was.

Should you move on? I don't think so, at least not in the sense of entirely cutting contact with your friend. If you are dissatisfied with his seeming aloofness, then perhaps, yes, seek out others with which to share your time and interests. It may also be that your friend simply has other concerns on his mind. People shift the focus of their concentrations from time to time. Your freindly neighborhood tiger, for instance, had to shift focus away from this public service for a while. It does not neccessarily mean the thing shifted away from is any less important, merely that some things have become more urgent. Note: there IS a difference between important and urgent.

Builder's Bane

A house design of mine has recently been copied, very, very closely. This person owns a design group and apparently I'm not good enough to invite. Good enough to copy but not invite me to the group? What should I do? :(

Ack! The builder's bane! I am so sorry you have had to endure this outrage, my friend. Unfortunately I am not much of an expert in this area. I'm not sure there is much you can do legally, though. Unless the copier employed textures you had created, and thus may have some copyright protection for, or you can somehow prove copybotting, then I do not know that you have much recourse vis a vis either Linden Labs sanction or other legal avenues. The people you will want to contact are the organizers of the Step Up! campaign (http://stepupsl.wordpress.com/) especially the Content Creators Association (http://contentcreatorsassociation.blogspot.com/) and those behind the Step Up ning (http://step-up-sl.ning.com/). I believe Miss Saffia Widdershins, editrix of Prim Perfect Publications and Designing Worlds hostess, is central to that group. They will be able to advise you better than I on the next steps you should take.

Ask a tiger.

Separation Anxiety

I am crazy about this woman I met in Second Life, she has become a very miportant part of my life both second and real life. We are both married and she feels strained keeping second and real separate...any advice I can pass on to her would be helpful.

Thank you for your question, my friend, and congratulations on making such a wonderful connection. Yours is not an uncommon dilemma in the realm of virtual relationships. I maintain that the separation between virtual and actual lives is one of the more difficult balancing acts we face in the digital age. The problem is that the veil of separation is often porous, or quite nearly transparent at times. It often depends on the individual. Some people have little trouble compartmentalizing their experience. Others, with a more holistic mindset, have great difficulty doing so. The most porous aspect of separation is the emotional. There is always an actual living person behind the avatar persona. (At least until the advent of Strong AI) The emotions evoked by the relationships we build in the virtual realm are undeniably real and often quite strong.

This is a topic on which I have expended much mental energy and have discussed at length with many of my close friends. There are many ways that people learn to deal with keeping the two worlds separate. Some don't bother to at all. One thing all of these have in common is the understanding that the virtual world does indeed effect the actual. Another is that one must have their actual life in order first. You say she feels strained. This indicates to me that while she may feel strongly for you she also feels strongly for her spouse. I do not know for sure what your beloved's conflict is, but I can guess that she may be feeling guilty about her association with you. If this is so, then she needs to sort out her relationship with her 1st Life spouse. I would advise you to do the same. I am not qualified to make any sort of pronouncement on whether a romance in SL constitutes an issue of fidelity in 1st Life. What I can say is that if the spouse believes it does, then that becomes a serious matter which must be resolved.

I fully appreciate the intensity of the connection and immediacy of emotions that Second Life® romances can invoke. I have had one or two myself. However, if your beloved is feeling a conflict within herself, then it is time to consider whether the experience you share is worth the potential damage or even dissolution of what may otherwise be loving and fulfilling relationshps in the physical realm.

Ask a tiger.

All my son eats is bacon and hot dogs and some potato chips and sometimes bread with peanut butter..this can;t be healthy what can I do he is four.

Thank you for your question, my friend. Dealing with a picky eater is tough. One part of me, the one that loves "guy food", says, "bacon, hot dogs, chips and peanut butter. Perfect! What's wrong with that?" At least your son has fixated on some long standing favorites. He has already acquired a real man's palate. Honestly, peanut butter, in this tiger's opinion, is surely one of the most perfect of foods. Thank you George Washington Carver. And bacon! My dear friend, I applaud you for introducing your offspring to the joys of bacon. But, yes, you are a good parent and quite right. Man cannot live on peanut butter and bacon alone, as much as we might wish we could. My older cub is also a picky eater; so, I know the challenge and concerns you face. I still cannot get either of my cubs to eat potatoes or eggs. I am not a nutritionist; so, take anything I say here with that in mind. With that said, let me first assure you that by and large children will eat what they need from a nutritional standpoint. It may be that your cub has a particular need for salt and protein at this time, or maybe he just likes the taste. As parents it is incumbent on us to provide our stubborn little ones with healthy choices; but, one must pick ones battles. At four years of age it is not always possible to reason with them. Instead, you might try to inject a bit of fun into the process. Make fun healthy snacks like carrot sticks with dip. Or, since he likes peanut butter, put some on celery sticks with raisins on it. This is called ants on a log (http://familycrafts.about.com/od/creativesnacks/r/antslogrec.htm). Supplementing his diet with children's vitamins is also acceptable; and do be sure to give him plenty of milk. Another thing you might try is combining those things he does like with new things. Make beans and franks, for example. If he likes cheese, mix it in with broccoli, or try green beans with bacon (http://southernfood.about.com/od/greenbeans/r/bln436.htm). In this way you can maybe start to broaden his idea of what tastes good. Be patient, be loving, and he will do just fine.

And now, all this talk of food has gotten me hungry. Please, allow me to share with you one of the most brilliant homages to bacon on the interwebs. I give you The Bacon Flowchart: http://bacontoday.com/the-bacon-flowchart/

Ask a tiger.

Picky Eater

All my son eats is bacon and hot dogs and some potato chips and sometimes bread with peanut butter. This can't be healthy what can I do? He is four.

Thank you for your question, my friend. Dealing with a picky eater is tough. One part of me, the one that loves "guy food", says, "bacon, hot dogs, chips and peanut butter. Perfect! What's wrong with that?" At least your son has fixated on some long standing favorites. He has already acquired a real man's palate. Honestly, peanut butter, in this tiger's opinion, is surely one of the most perfect of foods. Thank you George Washington Carver. And bacon! My dear friend, I applaud you for introducing your offspring to the joys of bacon. But, yes, you are a good parent and quite right. Man cannot live on peanut butter and bacon alone, as much as we might wish we could. My older cub is also a picky eater; so, I know the challenge and concerns you face. I still cannot get either of my cubs to eat potatoes or eggs. I am not a nutritionist; so, take anything I say here with that in mind. With that said, let me first assure you that by and large children will eat what they need from a nutritional standpoint. It may be that your cub has a particular need for salt and protein at this time, or maybe he just likes the taste. As parents it is incumbent on us to provide our stubborn little ones with healthy choices; but, one must pick ones battles. At four years of age it is not always possible to reason with them. Instead, you might try to inject a bit of fun into the process. Make fun healthy snacks like carrot sticks with dip. Or, since he likes peanut butter, put some on celery sticks with raisins on it. This is called ants on a log (http://familycrafts.about.com/od/creativesnacks/r/antslogrec.htm). Supplementing his diet with children's vitamins is also acceptable; and do be sure to give him plenty of milk. Another thing you might try is combining those things he does like with new things. Make beans and franks, for example. If he likes cheese, mix it in with broccoli, or try green beans with bacon (http://southernfood.about.com/od/greenbeans/r/bln436.htm). In this way you can maybe start to broaden his idea of what tastes good. Be patient, be loving, and he will do just fine.

And now, all this talk of food has gotten me hungry. Please, allow me to share with you one of the most brilliant homages to bacon on the interwebs. I give you The Bacon Flowchart: http://bacontoday.com/the-bacon-flowchart/

Ask a tiger.